Quick Note

Like usual I've had a lot on my mind lately, and right now what really is on my mind is how much I've changed. I compare myself to my high school self, and oh boy was I mess back then. I think if I were able to meet my past self some how I'd walk up to him, tell him to grit his teeth, and just bust him a good one right across the mouth. Seriously. I'm not to though what to make out of the person I am now. At times I feel like I''m walking down a road and I see the road splitting. One road being the good way to go, and the other the bad. I don't know man life is a mysterious, and unexpected journey. I realize though that all life really is is what you decide to make of it, and I'm definitely a way better person than I was before.  More positive, social, motivated, and awesome. In all seriousness this post isn't about much. I felt like I had to write something today, and well here it is as well as what's on my mind. One thing though.


Dear High School Elmer,

 Be strong you dumbass! Learn to let things go, and accept things for what they are. Don't try to make something out of any situation trust me that road leads no where. So save yourself some time and just live life for how awesome it should be. Be more social, go out, and have some fun for Christ sake. You won't be the world's best priest on World of Warcraft ( but I must admit you did a damn good job haha). That game will just be another phase. Stop looking for escapes in life and face your shit head on like the man  you will be. Start now so this isn't as difficult later on man. Be confident in who you are, and who you want to be. Forget what anyone else has to say man. If you don't take anything I say into consideration you will learn every lesson I'm trying to teach you... the hard way. Love you so much man! You have real potential, a burning spirit, now use it.
                               
                                                 With much Love,
                                                      Future You

P.S: Also get a head start on working out, that way I don't have to do all the work. Haha!

Influential People

It has been over a good year since my last post, and a lot has happened within that year. Long story short I'm back in Mesquite working and I'll be starting community college here until I decide my next move. I always think of the reasons I came back, and as much as I want to say it was money problems, or not being able to find a job, it all depended on the people that influenced me. Now to expand on that I really could care less what you think of me, I live my life the way I want to. I will fuck up and make mistakes and I will learn from them. What I do is for my better being and it shouldn't matter to anyone what I do, and there is nothing you can say or do to change my mind. However, if you are one of the few people who influence me and who's opinion matter then I might think twice. These people have had my back for anything, have always shown me the way, and just overall have been helpful. These are the people that influence me and could change my mind about anything.

Family: Let's knock this one out of the way. The 3 people in my family who influence me are my bro, mom, and dad. My bro has wanted to see more me which is why he always was there at the gym with me, and I thank him for that. Mom has taken care of raised me, and some day I wish to return the favor. She does what she can to make sure Adrian (my bro) and I make it to the top! My dad... We have had a rough patch in our past and I won't understand some things until we have a good talk, but you've wanted to make sure that I shape up to be ready for the world, which I'll admit I might not be ready, but I don't think anyone can expect to be ready for what's out there. I do appreciate all that my dad has done.

Fabian: Alright he is family also, but still. Fabian is by far my favorite cousin. I think I have a whole blog post dedicated to this kid. You should take a look after you done reading this.

Robert: Bro since elementary school. Amazing how much we've been through without one of us killing each other yet. We've had each others back since we met, and even though he had a slight hiatus when i needed him most I'm just more glad for him for finally getting his head out of his ass. Never doubted you for a sec man. I'll be here if you ever need me

Irving: Bro #2 since elementary been through just as much with you as with Robert. When I didn't have Robert I had you and vise versa. Times only got better with both of you around. I am sorry if whenever we pick on you we go a bit too far. Know you can count on me for anything.

Angie: This one is a little bit of a shocker, and I'm sure it would be to her if she read this. Friends since High School, we've been through quite a bit as well. I've had more arguments with Angie than any other friend I know, but no matter what has happened, like how we didn't talk for 2 years, we seem to get along just fine as if nothing had ever happened. I wish I knew why that is. She sure does know how to make me feel bad haha. That's a good thing though

Mayra: Dear God! Mayra! What would I have done in High School without you? I may have driven you crazy at times, but you did the same to me! Our friendship was one that I enjoyed the most. We fought like siblings and pretty much decided that we were separated at birth. You seem to have a voice of reason. I know I can trust you for anything.

These are the most influential people in my life! If I lost any of them I'm sure I'd be devastated. Wait! There is one more person that influences me and he is at the top of the list!

Me: Why yes when I really sat down and thought about it who has influenced me more to do something other than myself. Why I've done what I've done was all because I DECIDED to do. When you break down everything you've done it was always you're choice why things happened. I was the one who decided not to go back to Cedar, I decided after a thousand times being told by my mom to look for a job the thousand and one time I went and looked, I decided to go back to school because I liked to learn, and I'm here where I am today, because I decided to here.

So yeah I'll keep doing what I'm doing.... Now I decide to go to sleep before work! Haha! 

Question: Who are the most influential people in your life?

Epic Result!

I have been rather happy lately. Not only happy, but I've been also feeling way better about myself as well. The reason being is because Adrian, my best bro, put me to do a program he did to get a bit in better shape. The end result being me losing 29 pounds, and going down one shirt size. It was tough, but I believe it was definitely worth it. I love the encouragement from both Adrian and Mom, it really helped doing this a bit easier. Now what I ended up doing was something simple, a change in my diet and exercising. My meals consisted of a glass of freshly squeezed veggie or fruit juice (no sugar), a piece of fruit and vegetable in the afternoon, and lastly a my last meal was a fruit or plain salad. Mind you all these fruits and vegetables were eaten without being cooked or having something added to make it taste better. I will say that the only hard day was the first day, after that I started getting use to it, but it wasn't the diet alone my workout is what also helped. Adrian took me to the gym 6 days a week and worked me like a dog making sure I couldn't walk on days we worked out legs, or I couldn't move my arms on days we worked upper body. One month of all this turned things Around for me, and I haven't felt better. I wasn't to sure about going through with this when Adrian told me to do it. I didn't believe I would make a change in a month what so ever, but when I thought about it I knew I needed to get in shape or lose some unwanted poundage. It's not to say I wasn't happy before it's just your health will catch up to you when you get older, and I plan on sticking around for a while. I didn't want to end up in the point where I couldn't do anything about my health and had to leave it to the doctors. Stuff like that always scared me, and I'm glad I took action. It wasn't about looking good, It wasn't about showing off, it was about me being a bit healthier. I will tell you guys I love all the compliments I get it makes me feel a whole lot better than before. I have greater confidence than before, and over all I'm just happy with myself. I will never forget what Adrian told me to convince me to keep going, and I will end on this and a question for you guys to answer.
"When I worked at Smith's I would see people around your age heavy, and way overweight. I looked at them and thought of you thinking to myself that I couldn't let you get like that. I care about you're health and I will make sure you don't end up like that, I'll help you get through this and we're gonna change that flab into fab." -Adrian Moreno

I lost good amount of weight, and sure I'm still a bit husky, but I see a difference and overall I love the change. So my questions to you is... What is your biggest insecurity? What could you do to change this insecurity, and if you can do something about it why haven't you yet?              

P.S. There is always time in the day that you can spend for yourself. So don't say time. I would go tired to the gym at almost midnight sometimes. What kept me up at those times was nothing, but will power. If I can find time to take a few hours for my health you should be able to too. :]

P.P.S. Because This thing I was doing doesn't mean I'm gonna stop. I definitely can't eat as much as I used to, I will be watching what I'm eating, and I'll run everyday.

No Talent

So I'm not the type of person looking for a relationship, nor am I looking for one. Lately, however, I have noticed that when the time comes and I do want to get serious how am I gonna win the ladies over? In all honestly I've read some girls profiles, blogs, etc. It seems like the guys that actually have chance to be with a women are the ones who have some sort of unique artistic talent, whether it be playing an instrument, drawing, singing, dancing, writting, or some other skill that gets to the women. I thought about what my unique talent my be. Guitar? No, I tried learning and my fingers won't move the way I want them to. I haven't given up, it's just not the talent that will win a women's heart. Piano? HA! No, again, my fingers don't agree with how I play. When I play I don't make music I make some sort of awful God forbidden sound that makes you want to cut your ears off. I haven't given up on the piano either, but it's not my talent. Drawing? .... Let's just stop right there. Dancing? I'm not much of a dancer, I mean I was too shy to dance until the last bit of my junior year of high school after I stopped caring if people thought I looked like an idiot. Singing? Now this is a secret hobby of mine. I wish I could sing, I always enjoyed it, but my voice isn't exactly the greatest out there. My singing voice would just scare all the women away, and that would just be doing the exact opposite of what I'm trying to do. Writting? Another secret hobby of mine. I wish I was more artistic so I could write a masterpiece. Probably do something cliche like explain how a certain someone makes me feel, or talk about how amazingly beautiful they are. However I'm not much of a writter either. I have no skill what's so ever that would catch a women's attention. I know that you don't need one, but it does seem like you do to have a decent shot, and if I do have a talent I wish I knew what it was. Maybe... It's just listening. Girls dig that right? I love to listen to what people have to tell me, and unlike some men with there girlfriends, or wives who don't listen and just agree with everything, I actually show some interest in what someone tells me. It sounds lame I know, anyone can listen. Think Elmer think.... Maybe I'm just talentless, and in all honesty is that a bad thing? Who knows for now I'll just stop thinking about it and worry about other things.

Question for the post:
This one will have one for the guys and one for the girls.

Guys: Do you think it is important to have a skill to win a girls heart?

Girls: Would you like your man to have a unique skill?

I Want to Write a Song With You That Will Last a Lifetime!

I don't know why but I've been feeling rather poetic lately, but like everyone else who gets in this kind of mood I have writer's block. There is however one line I want to use in a poem, and that line is on the title of this blog. "I want to write a song with you that will last a lifetime." I have no idea where this came from, but it sounds familiar like from a song. I wouldn't doubt it if it did. Before I go looking up if it is or not I just wanted to explore the possibilities of what this ment.

1. Live my life with my significant other to the fullest. Do so many things together, things that make us happy. We'll write our "song" together as time goes on, and when the time has come and the end is near, we can look back on life and think of all the amazing things we've done, times we've had and just reminisce and listen to our amazing "song".

2. I took this a bit literal, but what if my partner and I wrote a song and kept adding on to it as life went on. Whenever something good happened we would play a jolly tune in our song, and when things went, bad we transition the song to sound a little more down, and just keep adding til we feel as if nothing else can be added. We will write the finale together, and see how it has all turned out.

I know It all sounds a little bit cheesy, but for one I didn't know how to word the 1st one tha well, but I was thinking something along those lines, and same goes for the second one. I hope I get around to writting a poem or something using that line. In the mean time good 'ol Elmer needs some sleep. Oh I know I haven't had a friend of the post in a while, but I have decided to stop that. So instead I will be having a question at the end of each post, and I would like to hear your answers! So this posts question is: What does that line mean to you? "I want to write a song with you that will last a lifetime". There is no right or wrong answer, but if you can just put your answer as a comment when I post a link to this on Facebook.  Sweet dreams everyone! :]

-Elmer

Not Ready

It has been quite a week for me. With finals, moving out, and finding a new place I have been stressed out, but thankfully things worked out in the end. Finals weren't as bad as I thought.... To be honest it seemed a little too easy. I got to come home last Thursday which is nice I really missed my family, and I'm glad my finals were over a day earlier. I have had a lot to think about these last couple of days, I mean when I moved out on Saturday my parents helped me move out into this new place, but what I forgot was that my mine was a neat freak. She's one of those women who won't stop until that last spec on the house is clean, and well my mom didn't find my room to be the "cleanest" around. It wasn't too bad by normal standards I mean it was picked up for the most part it wasn't terrible, but for her it was. Any who while picking up, cleaning, and moving I was talking to my roomies and they helped too. I knew this mess bothered my mom she had this "we need to seriously talk when your friends are not around" look you could tell she wanted to say something at that point, and my dad doesn't help much either because all he does is agree with whatever my mom says. Which is actually quite funny sometimes except when it's directed at me. Here is a little example:

Mom: I didn't like the food at that restaurant.

Dad: Oh I know it was terrible I mean my tea tasted terrible, their service was lousy, and that steak tasted was so awful! That waiter is lucky I tipped him what I did. I was even about to have the server let me talk to the manager.

Mom: Well I meant my food was bad... I didn't like my meal. The service was actually good, and my tea was good as well.

Dad: Well.... That's what I meant.

So with my mom being upset about the condition of our room (I share this room with my friend Robert) We get to talking about my way of being. I get a little annoyed and try to ignore most of it, but I realized quite of few things in that conversation. I don't think I was ready to move out, but then again who is. I feel as if  I wasn't ready at all for anything. I mean when I thought about it I never actually wanted to face the real world, I never wanted to leave. Part of me inside is still a little kid who doesn't want to take all these responsibilities, all I want to do is just be in my own world, be happy, and play video games. Which is bad cause I can see the little kid inside me just crying and pouting. I know I'm still not ready, but I know I have to shape up and grow up a little if not I won't get no where this way. On the brighter side of things I have been a little more outgoing which is nice, like I took a girl to the movies last Tuesday. It was definitely a nice break from studying for finals. Either way with  all this stuff going on since last week I'm glad to be home for the holidays. I needed this time to relax, and from this point on I will try to be a wiser person than I was before. That's all for now kiddies, If I don't write on here from this point till Christmas well may you all have happy holidays, and very Merry Christmas! :]

Fabian

Well last two weeks of school are here, and I will admit I never thought that school would be this stressful during finals. I mean I heard it got bad, but this is just something else. I'm gonna be alone here for these two weeks so this should be interesting. I started going back to my old self, and it's when I felt lost alone and as if no is there for me. I understand that I can't always have someone by me and that this is just merely a phase, but I never thought I would think like this again. I thought it was just all the High School stuff that made me this way, and it doesn't make sense why I feel this way now. Oh well... I try not to think too much of it, I got more important things going on at the moment. Although there is one way to counter this feeling, and it's something said by whom I believe is one of the most wisest men alive... Fabian Ramirez aka my cousin. "Life's too short not to be happy." These words changed me, and they also help balance me out when I felt like this back then, and I just remembered while I was typing what he had told me. The words are repeating in my head and you know what I don't feel as down as I did when I started this! It's true Life is too short and lately with a lot of change I decided to do life has been better than before. I don't live life as depressed as I was before, and it's because I decided to change. I mean I've been happier being who I really am around people . A good example is how I use to hide the fact that I played video games to people, and all because I thought people that was too nerdy, or how I liked certain things like anime or Magic. I got sidetracked off the main topic here but let's go back to my cousin. Fabian hope you're reading this sorry if I get all hallmark-y on ya. When I think about it I wouldn't be where I am today if it wasn't for my cousin here, seriously. He helped me get my college stuff together, made me less of a whiny bitch, and just taught me so much. I've enjoyed his company even when we we're little kids. Back then those we're... interesting times. The one thing I know for a fact he will never let me live down is when I ate on the bike and made a mushroom cloud on impact. I can't describe it well, but I'm sure he can. Well I think it's time for me to be hitting the sack. My bed is looking mighty sexy.

P.S I came up with the title after I was done with this post.